I came home to help Gramma after she had, had a pre-op procedure. This one an angiogram, which meant she couldn't use the arm they used like she normally would. We were in the kitchen making dinner, me doing the work and her doing the instructing, when she started telling me about her procedure. Specifically about the woman who introduced herself as Kathy. While Gramma was having the procedure Kathy took the time to pull down her mask and have a conversation with her. She asked where Gramma was planning on having the surgery and who her doctor would be. Once Gramma told her Tuality and Dr. Hill, Kathy told her that she would be with her before, during and after her surgery.
It made a big impression on her. She told that story to everyone who asked about her surgery. When we went into Dr. Hill's office for her pre-op appointment, she even told Dr. Hill. As we prepared for her surgery the following week, I could see Gramma getting a little nervous. When we went to the pre-op clinic for that appointment Gramma was telling the story to the woman asking questions. That woman was actually Kathy. Of course with no mask or cap she looked a little different. I could see Gramma physically relax as she realized that Kathy really was with her like she had said she would be. Kathy walked us through everything. She made sure that any questions Gramma had were answered, and that Gramma understood everything that was going to happen. When we headed back home the day before surgery, while still nervous, she knew exactly who we were meeting the next morning.
Arriving at the hospital and checking in Gramma was still telling the story of how Kathy had introduced herself during the angiogram. As Kathy was getting Gramma settled in, she continually made sure that Gramma was as comfortable as possible. She also continually informed us of what was going on and what to expect from how "see you soon's" would happen to how we would be updated about the progress of the surgery. I never once found myself in the waiting room thinking, "I wonder what's happening," because as soon as I would start to she would come walking in to give us the information.
When the surgery was over and we were going in to see Gramma, well that's when I learned how important Kathy was to me. As humans we only have so much control over our emotions and less over our emotional triggers. Kathy had prepared us on what we would see, but all my fears chose that moment to surface. The similarities, though they were VERY few, between walking into this room and what we had experienced when Papa was in the hospital, made me stop in the middle of the hall. I knew she would be on a ventilator, and even why, but I immediately thought of all the things that the other hospital didn't do right. Kathy gave me the time to control my emotions, we all know I can't talk when I'm that upset, and listened to my fears. The biggest one being that I wouldn't be there if something went wrong, that I wouldn't know. Kathy wrapped her arm around my shoulder and guided me forward. We walked into Gramma's room and Kathy immediately walked to the information board and asked for my number. She then made sure that the nurse knew it was there and that
I would be contacted. She explained things to me, and made sure that I knew what was going on. She introduced me to the nurse, and again the next day when I came in she was there, checking in on Gramma and introduced me to the new nurse. There was so much power in the level of comfort she was able to provide because she was there from the beginning. It's tough being alone in taking care of someone, but knowing Kathy was there and available through the whole process if I had questions was a huge weight off of my shoulders.
